Good evening Gentlemen , Being the fact the weather is kinda ruff I assume most people are staying in until it passes I wanted to let you all know I'm probably not gonna be available tonight due to to my impulsive unpredictable and unstable post I feel I can't help but post about myself weather it's true or half true or totally not true . it's either a turn on for a very low percentage of you or intertainment to keep me where I am later when it comes to dark carma with the laws of attraction for most of you or slightly concerning to a very less few of you not because you worry about me and my safety or well being but you feel kinda if not turn off and truly disqusted by me and lose interest anymore to put your weiner into my vagina and penetrate that good ole nasty fuck hole that's got you thinking while climaxing to your nut your about to bust about all sorts of things that are perverted and nasty . Anyways y'all I ain't ever gonna change I ain't ever gonna stop posting crazy unspeakable shit that ruins by life and helps my enemies work less hard because I just give it to them . But the thing about me is I got alot of fuckin issues and behaviors like a child I cant seem to break there are times when I try to keep my composer and act normal like a fucking human being because I dont like being treated the way I usually am by the majority of todays world 🌎 and I'm coming to the conclusion which I'm late on that . That the world is the way it is to people like me who are low class , outcast in society , uneducated , ignorant and inslaved due to lazyness like me and lack of motivation and carelessness for the things that are important to focus on in life rather then being focused on the things that are unimportant that causes I'm at this point it would be difficult to take me seriously most times weather I'm posting trying to make my ends meet or interacting with a person me taking but them not listening at all or even being concerned at all about what I'm saying . Today I lost all my rights to have a voice and i find myself stuck in alot of areas I worry about myself more as days go on because I'm giving unintentional mixed signals to others due to my demons I created that tourcher me every day that cause more pain that I can learn how to deal with and handle . This whole prostitution choice I choose to do 8 years ago maybe 9 that I can't seem to figure out if it's truly something I should or would need to continue doing because it's eating me alive . It's not because it's sex with a man or perverted or ruff fucking naked nasty it's because when I started out from the very beginning I slipped up on a few minors things and was unprepared for holding my own and I got put on by others who were considered also steet trash like me now . And those people werent teaching me the ropes they were just giving the bare minimum advise because out here shit ain't free and the game is supposed to be sold not told at least that's most people appinion. Anyways I can't think for certain exact mild slip up to give you an example but I can tell you those mild slip ups told on my unawareness and ignorance and ugly I have inside that I knew was there but thought others were clueless or slow but unfortunately I was and am the one who is fucking slow because I'm the one at the end of every day looking stupid and made in to a joke by society to keep egging it on my true issues I now have that I deeply suppress inside that are touchering me and eating me alive . I'm such a fucking joke in this world that people can't even find me worthy enough to tell me the truth about whats up . Instead I'm so less valued that they usually always keep a straight fucking face when i basically force them to look at me to my face all they do is lie lie lie . And that hurts and it hurts so fucking bad because I can't get past the point of matha fuckas pretending with me and I wonder since my privacy is always being invaded to the point I can't even have time to relax and get my nut off in peace because I'm a black Market item and I have no rights or voice anymore . My life is ruined and I'm the one responsible for that even if I have legit reasoning of why I choose to most likely started out as retaliation against people who misunderstand me, or uncomfortable with the difference in me when it comes to them and what's exceptable in society and what's not .I'm beyond what we all are in this world cattle to the one percent . But I'm lower im used in all kinds of ways for others to gain and when it comes to my pain and tourcherous mind fucking thoughts that keep me in constant fear or confusion and keep me going deeper down in the rabbit hole to where I find my self lost and fear I'll never be found . When it comes to life a very unique person from TC the six month rehab I was in said in group one day that there's a exasperation in life for every thing . And that always stuck with me because I fear that I'm passed recovering mentally I wander if I'm capable of breaking my meth addiction that doesn't serve me and I know makes me the worst version of my fucking self because I do struggle with mental illness and I do believe my brain isnt wired very healthy or strong and with a chemical imbalance the mind altering drugs makes it worse because it's spiritual and the fact that I'm uneducated, ignorant , co dependent and uncertain of myself that makes me now I know in a very dangerous place and scary place to be because I'm vulnerable and I know now and have learned through out my chaotic fucked up last 10 years from where this all first stared when my third eye poked open a little sooner then I wander God had intended for it to have be . Because I wish I could kill myself most days I think about it all the time but as much as I have experience in life that has wore me down I fear death and find myself worrying to much about where I'll go and if this reality is so painful here and I wish I had a way out well at least for the pain to stop I worry since my mistakes and me not knowing from the very beginning that's caused me to hate myself because there ain't to many people who can actually say I love you to me . But there are a few like my grandpa and at this point I'm content with that very much my father I think he might but is uncomfortable with me being his daughter because I'm so different and then theres the people I love who doesn't love me back but I still love them and except that they don't love me because love isn't selfish it's selfless it's patience, understanding and free of giving when you know you truly love someone you know you love them when you know and except they don't love you back and you still unconditionally love them and dont hold it against them for them not loving you . When you know you love someone you love them from what ever length that your intended to and true love never dies . When you know you love someone you love every thing about them you might not like every but you choose to love them because the love feels so good inside and that action that is also a feeling brings out the best in you for it love for them . But idk when it comes to the people in life you cross paths with that tell you everyday they love you and you share moments and hold conversation that brings connection and a bold that's worth protecting and cherishing between you both but you find out later that that person never loved you or cared about your well being at all infact they just told you they loved you because they knew you would appreciate Anyways I can't think for certain exact mild slip up to give you an example but I can tell you those mild slip ups told on my unawareness and ignorance and ugly I have inside that I knew was there but thought others were clueless or slow but unfortunately I was and am the one who is fucking slow because I'm the one at the end of every day looking stupid and made in to a joke by society to keep egging it on my true issues I now have that I deeply suppress inside that are touchering me and eating me alive . I'm such a fucking joke in this world that people can't even find me worthy enough to tell me the truth about whats up . Instead I'm so less valued that they usually always keep a straight fucking face when i basically force them to look at me to my face all they do is lie lie lie . And that hurts and it hurts so fucking bad because I can't get past the point of matha fuckas pretending with me and I wonder since my privacy is always being invaded to the point I can't even have time to relax and get my nut off in peace because I'm a black Market item and I have no rights or voice anymore . My life is ruined and I'm the one responsible for that even if I have legit reasoning of why I choose to most likely started out as retaliation against people who misunderstand me, or uncomfortable with the difference in me when it comes to them and what's exceptable in society and what's not .I'm beyond what we all are in this world cattle to the one percent . But I'm lower im used in all kinds of ways for others to gain and when it comes to my pain and tourcherous mind fucking thoughts that keep me in constant fear or confusion and keep me going deeper down in the rabbit hole to where I find my self lost and fear I'll never be found . When it comes to life a very unique person from TC the six month rehab I was in said in group one day that there's a exasperation in life for every thing . And that always stuck with me because I fear that I'm passed recovering mentally I wander if I'm capable of breaking my meth addiction that doesn't serve me and I know makes me the worst version of my fucking self because I do struggle with mental illness and I do believe my brain isnt wired very healthy or strong and with a chemical imbalance the mind altering drugs makes it worse because it's spiritual and the fact that I'm uneducated, ignorant , co dependent and uncertain of myself that makes me now I know in a very dangerous place and scary place to be because I'm vulnerable and I know now and have learned through out my chaotic fucked up last 10 years from where this all first stared when my third eye poked open a little sooner then I wander God had intended for it to have be . Because I wish I could kill myself most days I think about it all the time but as much as I have experience in life that has wore me down I fear death and find myself worrying to much about where I'll go and if this reality is so painful here and I wish I had a way out well at least for the pain to stop I worry since my mistakes and me not knowing from the very beginning that's caused me to hate myself because there ain't to many people who can actually say I love you to me . But there are a few like my grandpa and at this point I'm content with that very much my father I think he might but is uncomfortable with me being his daughter because I'm so different and then theres the people I love who doesn't love me back but I still love them and except that they don't love me because love isn't selfish it's selfless it's patience, understanding and free of giving when you know you truly love someone you know you love them when you know and except they don't love you back and you still unconditionally love them and dont hold it against them for them not loving you . When you know you love someone you love them from what ever length that your intended to and true love never dies . When you know you love someone you love every thing about them you might not like every but you choose to love them because the love feels so good inside and that action that is also a feeling brings out the best in you for it love for them . But idk when it comes to the people in life you cross paths with that tell you everyday they love you and you share moments and hold conversation that brings connection and a bold that's worth protecting and cherishing between you both but you find out later that that person never loved you or cared about your well being at all infact they just told you they loved you because they knew you would appreciate that and go above and beyond to never lose there love that was a lie the hole time and you find out there intensions for you had nothing to do with you at all but you were just there at the right moment for them to gain or come up . Yeah that's me y'all but I don't hold any of you all responsible I hold my self completely responsible for being lazy and unmotivated in life to correct myself before now it's to late and I'm sorry I am so difficult to be around or talk to I'm sorry I am the way I am and I'm sorry I'm so fucked up lost and vulnerable to everything and everyone around me that I'm not talking nasty and making them dicks hard like I was born to ether lay on my fucking back and do or sit on some penis and fuck it so good and nasty because first I'm a bitch when it comes to my identity then I'm a black Market item who had been passed around and sold in Secret by the worlds puppets and generational system . My faith is lacking and I'm scared for tomorrow I can't help it but tell the world the truth because all I got fucking left is the truth I hope at the end of my life I'm at least able to make peace with myself to be content enough to not hold on that and go above and beyond to never lose there love that was a lie the hole time and you find out there intensions for you had nothing to do with you at all but you were just there at the right moment for them to gain or come up . Yeah that's me y'all but I don't hold any of you all responsible I hold my self completely responsible for being lazy and unmotivated in life to correct myself before now it's to late and I'm sorry I am so difficult to be around or talk to I'm sorry I am the way I am and I'm sorry I'm so fucked up lost and vulnerable to everything and everyone around me that I'm not talking nasty and making them dicks hard like I was born to ether lay on my fucking back and do or sit on some penis and fuck it so good and nasty because first I'm a bitch when it comes to my identity then I'm a black Market item who had been passed around and sold in Secret by the worlds puppets and generational system . My faith is lacking and I'm scared for tomorrow I can't help it but tell the world the truth because all I got fucking left is the truth I hope at the end of my life I'm at least able to make peace with myself to be content enough to not hold on when it's time to let go . So I'm taking the remainder of this evening to reflect on something's don't worry for those of you who feel me I'm safe and not strong or bold enough to kill myself . I'm in the mindset to try to keep faking it until I make it and rise above it the best way I can . Tomorrow if anyone would like there jollies gotten off and you may want my mouth butthole or vagina for whatever I'll except then hmu I know for most of you your hoping to reach out to the crazy unstable suck a dick and fuck a dick bareback for 30 🌹Isabella but I'm hoping you get Isabella who is in a much more certain place with herself to not give in to most of your ways to control me when it comes to my weaknesses or the things you never let go and use against me later when it comes to getting the most for a whole lot of nothing yesterday it's ashamed I had sex with 3 men in a 12 hour period and only profited on 105 dollars I wish I wasn't so worthless